Description

Are you looking for a Ben Torah for your daughter? How will you determine if a prospective match is right? This booklet will help, with 50 questions that you can ask yourself, the student’s rav, friends and others.

From the booklet:

Introduction

One of the most common laments I hear from parents in the shiddoch process is “I can’t get clear answers to my questions”. An alternative version is “I’ve asked a lot of questions but I’m not getting clarity.” This lack of clarity is most often due to parents not asking the right type of questions. Rather than general questions, such as “does he have good midos” or “is he a good learner”, parents must ask very specific questions, which will leave the responder with no choice but to answer in a way that will provide the parents with greater clarity. To that end, I’ve compiled a list of questions addressing specific points. Some of these may be questions that apply in your particular case, and some may not apply to you. It is also by no means an all-inclusive list. However, if used as a guide it can be very helpful for parents navigating the field of shidduchim. The questions listed, what I call category 1, are all regarding the character and personality of the young man being investigated. Questions regarding family finances, health issues of the boy or his family members, siblings struggling with yiddishkeit or family members involved in various inappropriate pursuits, category 2, must be asked to the shaddchan, the family’s rav, or someone who knows the family well. Assistance from your own rav may be needed.